Halfway There!

Today is day 15 of the 30 day Juice Fast I've been doing with Kat! Just over two weeks until I am done. I already feel this amazing sense of accomplishment and power. I can't wait to see what the end will bring!

I'm still trying to figure out what my plan will be after I'm done. I'm going home to visit at the end of February and might do another, much much shorter fast right before I leave. I bought a jar of applesauce to eat when I'm finished with this fast. I figured that'd be a good first food for my dormant digestive system. All the stuff I've read about fasting suggests taking it very slow when breaking the fast.

By the way, if anyone is considering a fast and would like some information on it, I've done a lot of research and would love to share it with you. The supposed benefits of a fast are really amazing, besides the dramatic weight loss. So just ask and I'll start posting what I know. Also, Kat and I still have our Ana Facebooks. We've both been slacking a bit in that department with busy lives getting in the way. But it'd still be great to see more girls joining and sharing.

Not much else is going on. This ridiculous school week is finally over. I've had so much work I've hardly had time for anything else. In fact, I haven't worked at all this week. Thankfully I only need to make about fifty bucks to be set for bill paying on the 1st of the month.

I'm going to my boyfriend's tonight. He's been sick this past week and still isn't at full health. So we have to see each other without doing anything inappropriate. We'll see how well that goes.

Keep Starving, Girls! Don't doubt yourselves! <3

Day Twelve of Juice

Today was very uneventful. I had to work on this enormous paper I have to do for class since I procrastinated all weekend. But thankfully I got most of it done and I still have all of tomorrow to work on the rest.

I got some orange juice at Whole Foods yesterday and it tastes so incredible. I can tell that my tastes have changed because I don't think orange juice would have tasted so good to me a couple weeks ago. It's even helping satisfy me when I start getting a craving for just about any thing to eat. I haven't watered it down quite as much as I have my other juices. I just really need some flavor and I still only had about 50 calories today.

I don't think I'll be able to weigh myself until Friday which will make it almost an entire week. I can't wait to see how much I'll have lost. I've been losing about a pound a day, though sometimes a bit less. Still, it's pretty dramatic progress. I have such a long way to go, but I feel like I can make it.

I've been trying to figure out what my plan will be after my fast. I can only avoid eating out with my boyfriend for so long and a friend of mine even commented on me not eating. So I'm thinking about doing a very restricted diet, though actually eating. Maybe like 300 or 400 calories a day. Then giving myself a break if my boyfriend wants to take me out, which should only be like once a week tops. We have this really romantic Valentine's Day dinner planned where we're both going to cook for each other and I'm so excited about it I can hardly stand it. So my fast ends just in time (the 6th) for me to start back eating slowly and be ready for an actual meal on the 14th.

Sometimes not eating feels so hard, but days keep going by and I keep not eating. I feel sick to my stomach so often it makes it a lot easier not to eat. And I really never actually feel hungry at all. I just feel like eating a lot. But I am just going to keep trekking. I know I can do this. I found a new thinspiration too. They are playing marathons of America's Next Top Model on cable. I can just watch beautiful girls to distract myself, especially if I'm having a boring day.

My cravings have gotten so bad that I've actually started dreaming about food. Isn't that crazy? Thankfully my dreams have been so vivid and in every one I have gorged myself on all this disgusting food and felt so horrible and guilty afterward. And just tremendously upset with myself for ruining my fast. I always get so concerned about what I'm going to do to purge it and take it back. I usually wake up still feeling guilty and then feel such a rush of relief that it was only a bad dream. So my dreams really aren't tempting me. It's almost like they get the desire to binge out of my system without all of it having to happen. If I got to bed wanting food, I wake up wanting to starve.

Jena, thank you so much for the tip about those Chromium Piccolate capsules. I will definitely check them out. Though I am a little hesitant to take any sort of pills because my stomach has been really sensitive since I've been depriving it so much. But in less then three weeks I'll be back to eating food and this would be fantastic.

I promise I'll be posting more! No more lazy blogging!

<3<3

Today Marks Two Weeks Without Food

I'm really tired, but I just wanted to post something quick. I've been lazy about posting and I don't want that. I don't want to get lazy about anything that helps me lose weight, plus I do miss the support from you fabulous girls.

Tomorrow I will post more. I have a lot to write about, but no energy for it tonight.

<3 You all!

First Week of Juice Starving Down!

Geeze! When was the last time I posted? Feels like centuries. It's been a pretty busy week. Thank you for all of the encouraging comments last time, it really is such a huge help to me. Knowing that there are just a few girls out there counting on me is the biggest motivation ever. And I have managed to keep my fast, even though it's gotten harder. If I hadn't been so busy, I probably would have ruined it though.

I did a couple of things to help me keep motivated. I printed out a free 2009 calendar and have been marking all the days I've gone without food. So far, the 5th through the 14th. I also put stars on the days I only drank water. It looks so good to see it drawn out like that. And I have the date my fast is done circled. I know I can do it, this was a rough week, but I still made it through.

I also tried on a pair of pants that were horribly tight I had to absolutely force them to zip the last time I wore them months ago. This time they zipped right up, still pretty hip hugging. Progress is progress though. I know my face has gotten thinner and my jeans have been so baggy. It's hard to tell if that's just from them getting stretched out. But I keep thinking that someone should have noticed it.

I can make them notice.

I spent Tuesday night with my boyfriend. We went out and had tea at this really neat tea house. They had so many different teas! It was really fun. Plus we got to go out without food being involved. He's the only part of my life that I'm really worried about in regards to messing up the fast. It's so hard for me to accept spending less time with him. I just have to remember how worth it this will be. He's going to think so too.

I went straight from his house to school so I wasn't able to restock on juice and it's just to expensive to buy it from the campus store. Then I ended up spending the night with at a friend's dorm and and going straight to class in the morning. So yesterday and today have been water only fast. It's kind of nice to do that again. I'll go back to juice tomorrow. I wonder if I will have lost more weight though.

That's all i really have to write about today. I'm so so sleepy. But tomorrow is my day off. I will definitely catch up on everyone's blogs and progress then.

Beautifully thin thoughts to all of you! <3

Day Five! of the Great Juice

I am really really starting to hate the snow. I got up all early this morning so I could go to school and use the computer lab to finish a paper for my eight o'clock class. I got to the door and the ground was covered in snow and it was still coming down like crazy. My poor car hates starting when it's so cold, so it took my like twenty minutes just to get on the road. And it was snowing so hard I could hardly see. I was going like ten miles an hour the whole way but I still slid all over the road. Driving in the snow still terrifies me so much.

Then I get to school and have to trudge through it, by the time I got inside I looked like a snowman because I was so covered in it. I finished my paper just in time. I get to class and find out the teacher can't make it, due to the snow of course. So I went through all that for nothing. I could be in my warm bed still snoozing, but instead I got up four hours before I needed to, for nothing. I'm sorry to rant so much, but snow is horrible.

I've already had most of the juice that I allow myself for the day. I've just been so thirsty for some reason and my mouth is so dry. I'm not sure if I'm dehydrated or something. I'm not worried about the juice because it's such a small amount of actual juice in my 8 ounces, that I've been going on hardly any calories. I'll see if I can buy something semi healthy in the campus store and dilute that for the rest of the day. A hundred calories isn't really anything to get worked up about. I have a creative presentation in speech today and I want to have plenty of energy for that. I get so nervous and it would be horrible to pass out in front of everyone.

The weekend went well. I still haven't eaten anything. But Saturday night at my boyfriend's, my stomach started hurting so bad. It wasn't hunger pains, just felt sort of nauseous and bloated. It was awful. Most of the time I feel pretty normal so far on my fast, I wish I didn't have to get sick in front of him. I don't want him to get worried about it. He even asked me when the last time I ate was, I told him I ate at my friend's right before I came over. I wonder how he would have reacted if I had said seven days ago.

I do feel like my resolve is waning somewhat. Last night I was watching a movie on TV and there were so many food commercials. It's so strange how I feel watching them. A cross between disgusted and totally craving it. My stomach doesn't really feel hungry anymore, but the desire to eat is still there. The good news is that the smell of food is still so strong to me and it definitely kills my appetite. I can always smell stuff from upstairs and my landlord's wife is Mexican, so their food is always very strong smelling. I have to cover my nose because it just stinks so much to me now.

I have to get going to finish a few things before class starts. Thanks for reading, ladies. I hope everyone is doing well with their goals, I'll hopefully be catching up on some of your blogs tonight.

Keep Starving!

Juiced to the Third

I don't really have too much to report on today. I've been at home all morning, pretty much being lazy, but I did get some time to work. Since I've started school again I've been just barely making my daily quota. I really need to keep up.

I'm about to head over to a friend's house and then make my way to my boyfriend's. I really wanted to see him earlier, but I'm afraid if I go over too early he'll offer to feed me and I won't be able to say that I already ate. I wish I could just tell him. I wish I thought he would understand. Oh well, I'll just have to see less of him for the next twenty eight days.

In other news, day three of the fast is going fine. But the hardest part is coming up: hanging out with friends and sleeping over at boyfriend's house. I'm just thankful I have you lovely ladies on my side and that having to write everything down here keeps me strong.

Being a shut in really would make life easier.

I did some research on a salt water flush today. Every fasting site recommends doing an enema during a fast to help your body with the detoxification process, but a salt water flush is free. And after six days without any food, I should be able to handle it. Tomorrow is the day, I'll report on how it goes.

A quick update on Facebook! Kat and I are on there now. She's made a general Pro-Ana group and I've made a fasting group. Please please join us! Making an Alias on Facebook is quick and easy. I think it will be a fun way to get more support and keep ourselves motivated. Check my last entry for my facebook page. Pro-Ana groups have to be kept secret to avoid getting banned, so if you friend me, I'll then invite you to the group.

That's all for today, Folks. Hopefully I'll have more exciting news tomorrow.

<3

Five Days Foodless-Two Days Juiced and Facebook!

Kat is Awesome!

Kat from Quest for Perfection made a Pro-Ana Facebook alias. I'm all for a Facebook community! This blog has really helped me to keep myself on track and you girls are so inspiring! Facebook can bring us even closer. So here is my Ana Facebook page:



My technical skills are severely lacking, so if that doesn't work search for Eva Volando. I'll be making a group for the 30 day juice fast that I started yesterday. I'd love for anyone to get on board with it. It doesn't matter if you have to start late, or have to do just a couple of days. I've really found that fasting feels amazing. If you don't think you are capable of doing it, just give it a try, we'll be here to support you, and you might be surprised how good you feel once you start. I never would have gotten my weight on track if I hadn't done a fast to get my brain in gear and motivated.

Also, I've been doing a Ton of research on fasting and all the amazing benefits to your health: mind and body. I even read a really great article written by an actual M.D. so it's not just a bunch of crazy people who believe in the power of fasting. Once I get the fasting group started I will post as much info about the benefits, struggles, and methods to fasting as I can find. But I also have an idea.

Kat mentioned that she has to eat because of parents, and I totally know how lame they can be, but I thought if she or any other of you lovely gals have this same problem, you could just tell your parents you want to do a juice fast. Sounds crazy, I know, but let me explain. Kat has also mentioned that her parents are happy that she's losing weight and getting healthier. If you explain all the benefits of fasting and show your parents that it's not that just anorexics do, they may be okay with it.

I would really suggest giving this a try, especially if your parents are totally in the dark about your Ana Love. Print some info out for them to read and understand. Tell them you won't be going without calories or nutrients because your drinking juice. You can tell them that you're going to drink a lot more juice than you actually do. And they don't have to know that 3/4 of that glass is water. You may end up with parents who are not only just void of suspicion when you don't eat, but also even support you and help you to avoid food.

It's just a thought, obviously you know your parents better than I do. But I know how frustrating it is not to be able to control your own diet.

Day two of my fast is going great. I drank maybe a third of my bottle of diluted juice and then filled it up to the top with more water this morning. I'm going to try to drink half of it today and the other half tomorrow. I don't think there could even be 100 calories in the whole bottle. I just finished my cup of oolong tea with honey in it. It's 60 calories for a tablespoon, but I probably used half that (though I'm horrible with eyeballing it). No more than 80 callories for the day, I would guess though.

Last night I told my boyfriend I had just eaten when he suggested going out for sushi (even though sushi is maybe my favorite food ever), worked perfectly. He and his roommate had Subway. I was sandwhiched (haha pun!) between them on the couch and the smell was so strong. I think my sense of smell is a lot strong after four days without food because the smell was absolutely sickening. Though before I think it would have smelt delicious to me. I'm glad that the smell of food makes me nauseous not hungry.

Fasting is so perfect!

My boyfriend has a scale hidden under his bathroom sink and after he left for work this morning and I finally dragged myself out of bed, I weighed myself. I was hoping for five pounds. I would have felt good about five. When I saw the number my jaw dropped.

I have lost twenty freaking pounds.

I haven't weighed myself since before Thanksgiving, but still! I'm so excited! I wish I knew how much of that was from the fast and how much was just from less extreme cut backs since Thanksgiving.

Get on Facebook, Gals! <3