Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Please Don't Eat Tonight

I'm on day three of a fast, almost done with day three actually. Hours away from sleep and a whole new day. But I am trying so hard to talk myself into eating. It doesn't make any sense. I'm young and I could be beautiful. Why would I do anything to get in the way of that. I'm only losing time. I feel so helpless lately. Just giving in to food and wanting. And one day turns into another month that I've lost. Another month that I could have fasted. All these months wasted. I could be thin by now. I could be beautiful by now. I could happy by now.

I will not eat tonight.

9 comments:

  1. You can do it! I know you can :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. You ARE beautiful. You don't need the restriction or the fasting or the one month turning into another of self-hate.

    You ARE beautiful. Want to know how I know? The way you write. The struggles you have with everyday life, yet you still manage to wake up every day and try to live.

    So don't *if* or *but*, because you are a beautiful woman, and you deserve happiness. You deserve to eat and feel good about it. <3

    ReplyDelete
  3. Go for it! You and I both know you can do it! Just last night I binged. I know you're better than I am, pursue your happiness.
    Please keep blogging. It is only people like you that keep me strong.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh hon I hope you succeed go for it you can do it!
    So proud of you already.

    love x

    ReplyDelete
  5. The girls that say you're doing well to fast only perpetuate the self-inflicted torture of an eating disorder. When you fast, you feed Ana, and she's never full. Being thin does not make you happy because you live in constant fear of losing that, it's an unsustainable high.
    You want to eat because you're supposed to. You are not different, you're a human being like everyone else. I hope for your sake that it sinks in, soon.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I only just came across your blog after creating my own. Your strength is so inspiring. You sound like such an amazing person, good luck with everything.

    ps. I know this sounds like a lame pitch, but please check out my blog, see what you think guys :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. i really understand you, i have the same... I think - yes, this time belongs to me, i will be thin, I WILL BE, but after few days i give up... why? why it's so hard to keep going ?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hey, I noticed art as one of your interests, I started a new art blog maybe u'll like it! Thanks and keep up great work.

    ReplyDelete