Sunday, April 12, 2009


Today I ate.

Food is so good. After so long without it, all the flavors taste so intense. It was great, but it's hard to allow myself anything to eat without feeling guilty and weird. And I have such a bad problem with guilty feelings. It's hard to explain what happens to me, but it's like any time I do something wrong when it comes to eating, I just do it even more.

I ate like two or three bites of applesauce first. A few hours later I had just like four bites of black beans. My refrigerator is bare, so my options were limited. I had some crackers that we made in class and I ate too many of those. By too many, I mean like too many for a crazy person. For a normal person, everything I ate today wouldn't even equal a meal, but for me I felt like a glutton. Lucky my stomach hasn't felt upset at all really, just a bit strange.

Anyway, I'm not in much of a blogging mood today. I hope everyone is doing great. <3


  1. apparently, what you are doing to break your fast is in accordance with what dietitians recommend: starting off slowly with fruits/ vegies as opposed to anything too heavy.

    Good for you, I hope one day to experience the intensity of taste as you so deservedly feel now.

    so inspiring!


  2. I hope you are doing well eva. I wish I had your control. i am striving for it.

    much love,

    ella xx

  3. It's so wonderful to hear these details of your experience of fasting. It sounds like a cliche, but it really is inspiring and very useful information to keep on board for when I feel brave and strong enough to fast myself.

    xx Pasco