Rebirth! Kinda, a little bit.

Today I feel good. Moreover, I feel inspired. I feel happy. I feel like I'm in control again. Like really. In control. I haven't felt like this all summer, even during the short fasts I've done. In order for me to do a successful fast, there has to be something that just clicks inside me and makes it easy. I've been waiting for it to happen all summer, but I think it's been stifled by being home, surrounded by food and family, and all the stress and disappointment I feel about my summer not going at all the way I planned.

I will starve myself thin.

I will lose enough weight for my boyfriend to notice.

I will I will I will I will Iwill I will I will

I have more family coming into town this week and again next week. Ridiculous. I plan to use the raw fruit/veggie diet excuse to get out of eating family dinners which are the worst. I'd like to make it through the rest of July secretly fasting and then I can openly fast through August. Or something. I can't plan things exactly when I'm so surrounded by people who want to fatten me up. Damn.

I've neglected the blog world since I've been sulking underneath this black cloud, but I'll do some catching up today. Swear.

P.S. I promise to do put together some information on fasting in my next post, specifically extended fasting (like more than ten days) for those of you who have asked for it.