Monday, January 12, 2009

Day Five! of the Great Juice

I am really really starting to hate the snow. I got up all early this morning so I could go to school and use the computer lab to finish a paper for my eight o'clock class. I got to the door and the ground was covered in snow and it was still coming down like crazy. My poor car hates starting when it's so cold, so it took my like twenty minutes just to get on the road. And it was snowing so hard I could hardly see. I was going like ten miles an hour the whole way but I still slid all over the road. Driving in the snow still terrifies me so much.

Then I get to school and have to trudge through it, by the time I got inside I looked like a snowman because I was so covered in it. I finished my paper just in time. I get to class and find out the teacher can't make it, due to the snow of course. So I went through all that for nothing. I could be in my warm bed still snoozing, but instead I got up four hours before I needed to, for nothing. I'm sorry to rant so much, but snow is horrible.

I've already had most of the juice that I allow myself for the day. I've just been so thirsty for some reason and my mouth is so dry. I'm not sure if I'm dehydrated or something. I'm not worried about the juice because it's such a small amount of actual juice in my 8 ounces, that I've been going on hardly any calories. I'll see if I can buy something semi healthy in the campus store and dilute that for the rest of the day. A hundred calories isn't really anything to get worked up about. I have a creative presentation in speech today and I want to have plenty of energy for that. I get so nervous and it would be horrible to pass out in front of everyone.

The weekend went well. I still haven't eaten anything. But Saturday night at my boyfriend's, my stomach started hurting so bad. It wasn't hunger pains, just felt sort of nauseous and bloated. It was awful. Most of the time I feel pretty normal so far on my fast, I wish I didn't have to get sick in front of him. I don't want him to get worried about it. He even asked me when the last time I ate was, I told him I ate at my friend's right before I came over. I wonder how he would have reacted if I had said seven days ago.

I do feel like my resolve is waning somewhat. Last night I was watching a movie on TV and there were so many food commercials. It's so strange how I feel watching them. A cross between disgusted and totally craving it. My stomach doesn't really feel hungry anymore, but the desire to eat is still there. The good news is that the smell of food is still so strong to me and it definitely kills my appetite. I can always smell stuff from upstairs and my landlord's wife is Mexican, so their food is always very strong smelling. I have to cover my nose because it just stinks so much to me now.

I have to get going to finish a few things before class starts. Thanks for reading, ladies. I hope everyone is doing well with their goals, I'll hopefully be catching up on some of your blogs tonight.
Keep Starving!


  1. Don't lose motivation! You're doing so well and we're relying on you.

    No pressure though :]

  2. congrats on getting your paper done on time even though it felt like it was for nothing. And you are right, 100 calories is really nothing to fuss about. I'm losing slowly and maintaining energy by allowing myself to eat at times, just not all the time. I know how much is too much. But to restrict absolutely everything is unrealistic- the only time I go for long amounts of time without eating is when I have no appetite. That does happen, more often than not. So listen to your body, satisfy it when you need to, because i think you'll get more results. Plus then you won't look quite as pastey. (I noticed that, anyway). Take care other than that :) Thinking of you. xoxo

  3. Hey babe, don't worry about your waning resolve. It happens to us all. The important part is (even if you do break your fast) COME BACK! A line from one of my favorite songs is: "Mistakes are not the same as disregard." Meaning (at least in my mind) that if you make a mistake and eat, it doesn't mean you "failed" just means you slipped. Ana is forgiving, she will welcome you with open arms. Just make sure to not give up for the ultimate goal of THIN!!!

    Good job on our fast. You keep me strong, girl. :)